Possibly the best book ever, in world history: Six of Crows Review

Synopsis: Ketterdam: a bustling hub of international trade where anything can be had for the right price–and no one knows that better than criminal prodigy Kaz Brekker. Kaz is offered a chance at a deadly heist that could make him rich beyond his wildest dreams. But he can’t pull it off alone…

A convict with a thirst for revenge.

A sharpshooter who can’t walk away from a wager.

A runaway with a privileged past.

A spy known as the Wraith.

A Heartrender using her magic to survive the slums.

A thief with a gift for unlikely escapes.

Six dangerous outcasts. One impossible heist. Kaz’s crew is the only thing that might stand between the world and destruction—if they don’t kill each other first.

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REVIEW

AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

^ That’s me screaming.

This has been: my full review of Six of Crows. Bye.

I guess I can elaborate on that, but really it’s going to boil down to the same thing. Which is me screaming.

I’m only, like, 17% joking. I have no idea how to review this book. I barely even knew how to read this book, due to the fact that it was so devastatingly cool and exciting and unique and addictive that it almost made me illiterate.

When I first read this book, I loved it. Absolutely aDORED it. I five-starred it and participated in the hype and probably googled fan art exactly one time, which is as far as I ever get in terms of joining a fandom.

However. That guaranteed absolutely nothing.

As I have said 3467824628 times, any opinion of mine older than approximately 18 months cannot be trusted. I am on a continual process of growth and I am very stupid. Here is where I always list a hot take younger me had (such as thinking the television program “Degrassi” was the apex of cinematic art), or something dumb younger me did (such as literally never eat a salad even once), in order to illustrate just how stupid that was.

This is the person who read and loved Six of Crows.

That version of me was also #new to the book-internet scene and, ahem, DESPERATE TO FIT IN. I think I initially four-starred A Court of Thorns and Roses despite not liking it at all just to seem Hip and Down With The Teens.

Obviously I went back and surreptitiously changed that rating.

Anyway, what it’s coming down to is that it’s absolutely possible that then-me could have tricked myself into liking this book just out of a desperate desire for popularity, and that even if I did actually like it it wouldn’t matter because I was (and continue to be) a fool.

Luckily, THAT WAS NOT THE CASE.

This book is fan-f*cking-tastic. It blows all other YA fantasy out of the water (okay except The Raven Cycle I see you Maggie Stiefvater I would never forget about you Gansey).

It’s everything the genre should be. It’s creative and immersive and unique. It’s stylistically great without being overly stylized. The plotline is nearly nonstop exciting. There is a MAP.

Nearly most importantly of all, there is a HEIST. Everyone who’s anyone knows that the best trope-y plotline is a heist. We get squads and excitement and scheming and risk and THEFT. And just yesterday someone asked me earnestly if I’m a kleptomaniac, to which, after a bit of reflection, I answered “Yes.”

But there is a lil thing I mentioned in there that I need to talk more about. And it’s not my potential kleptomania. (Although maybe I should talk more about that too. In a different format.)

That thing is: THE SQUAD!!!!

The characters in this book are so fantastic. Our gang is made up of six people, whom I will now list here as if it’s even slightly possible that anyone hasn’t read this book yet. They are: Kaz, Inej, Jesper, Wylan, Nina, Matthias.

Is that a ranking? I don’t know. You decide. (Yes it is a ranking.)

I LIKE THREE OF THOSE CHARACTERS. THREE!! OUT OF SIX!!! To anyone else that may sound like a fairly low number. You know. Fifty percent. A failing grade. But I’ve always been a glass-half-full kind of person, and by “always” I mean “exclusively in this exact scenario for the sake of my argument.”

What it comes down to is the fact that I rarely truly like even a single character in a book. So to like THREE!! IN ONE NOVEL! Unbelievable.

Kaz is a dark nightmare boy who threatens to be a Hot Boy With A Tragic Backstory And So He Is Allowed To Be Mean To Everyone Especially Girls He Likes And You Can’t Say Anything About It, but he subverts that trope gorgeously. (By which I mean: Leigh Bardugo is the queen of YA, and also literature and being a person in general.)

Inej is a spooky lil sneaky gal who climbs around stuff and is the single most powerful creature in all of fictional humankind. Also Inej is just a cool name. EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS BOOK AND ITS WORLDBUILDING IS COOL.

Jesper is a hilarious f*cked up lil monster who is trying his damn best and being a sarcastic sweetheart while he’s at it. Plus shooting at stuff, which adds some excitement and flair to the whole thing.

The other three…they’re just pretty boring. Wylan is Nice but that’s not enough to make me like a character. Nina is just like “Food!!! Yum!!! Love to eat, and also be sexy!!!” And if anyone could show me actual proof Matthias has one (1) trait besides liking Nina and being strong, I’d fall out of my chair. Because I’d be surprised. And also statistically speaking I’d probably be sitting.

BUT ANYWAY this is a five star review and that means I don’t have to complain!!! Who knew!! All new to me.

This book united stupid me and current me, which means that people who are dumb and have bad taste and people who are very very cool and like good things only can be united in liking this book.

It is literally so good that it’s impossible to not like it, even if you’re an idiot or picky. PICKY IDIOTS: UNITE!!!

Bottom line: Can anyone give me Leigh Bardugo’s mailing address? Not for anything creepy, I just want to blow a kiss into an envelope and ship it to her.

Oh, that is creepy? Got it. I would still like that address though.

 

Have you read Six of Crows? (You totally have, right?) What did you think? (You totally loved it, right?)