When We Collided Review

Synopsis: We are seventeen and shattered and still dancing. We have messy, throbbing hearts, and we are stronger than anyone could ever know…

Jonah never thought a girl like Vivi would come along.

Vivi didn’t know Jonah would light up her world.

Neither of them expected a summer like this…a summer that would rewrite their futures.

In an unflinching story about new love, old wounds, and forces beyond our control, two teens find that when you collide with the right person at just the right time, it will change you forever.

Review: 1/5

Did someone carefully look at all my reviews/read my mind, discover my worst nightmare, and write that book? Because if so, it’s called When We Collided, and it’s available wherever books are sold!

The gal’s a manic pixie dream girl, the guy’s an extremely bland doormat. Reading this book was so unpleasant. They started quasi-dating (i.e., she force-kisses him at random times – “of all the quirks about life with Vivi, her ready-or-not approach to kissing me is the most disorienting”) pretty much immediately after she forces him to make her dinner. (Which is, you know, a few hours after they meet.) Vivi is an absolute burden on Jonah’s already supremely difficult life. She flirts with other guys and gets mad when he talks to other girls. She’s possessive, she’s crazy – but it’s alllll okay because she’s just so quirky. Sans the quirkiness, she’s what I expect from my least favorite male archetype, and I had enough.

At the halfway point, I already had a deep hatred for Vivi that I had never experienced before. The plot was redundant (she’d gotten mad at him for talking to the same childhood friend twice; they do the same thing every day). Swaths of time were skipped. He treated her childish requests (for restaurant birthday parties, for meals made for her, for Slip n Slide playdates) like commands. They were just such a bad fit for each other, and I was actively rooting against them. (Very different from the “summer that would rewrite their futures”/”new love”/”colli[sion] with the right person at just the right time” written about in the synopsis.)

In short, reading this was almost as much of an entirely-negative burden as Jonah’s relationship with Vivi. There are times, in the middle of books, that you realize reading is supposed to be fun. So eff this. I hated reading this and I’m not going to force myself to continue. And you know what, Vivi? I’m counting your dumbass antics toward my reading challenge anyway. So.

Bottom line: if you like YA love stories about totally unrealistic teens suffering from mental illness (cough cough, if you’re a John Green fan, cough) then check this book out. Otherwise – and this is a serious warning – STAY AWAY.

P.S.: On a petty note, I hate the cover of this book. So…bad first impression.

P.P.S.: Came back to insert the synopsis into this and I’m like…vom. It’s a hatred that grows stronger with age.

P.P.P.S. Even editing this review to post here was just, like, too much. I despised this VISCERALLY. And that’s just from the halfway point! Can you imagine if I’d made myself finish this???

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